Unlocking the Secret Place: Cultivating Intimacy with God for Spiritual Growth
In a world overflowing with noise, distractions, and demands, the concept of a “secret place” with God might seem distant or even unattainable. Yet, it is precisely in this sacred space—a place of solitude, stillness, and surrender—that we unlock the key to spiritual growth and transformation.
For wives, this connection is essential not only for personal spiritual growth but also for building a strong, Christ-centered marriage.
As Paul stated in Philippians, our determined purpose should be to know Him, grow deeply in intimacy, and be transformed by His power. By cultivating intimacy with God, we also cultivate a deeper connection with our spouse, rooted in His love and grace.
The Importance of Unlocking the Secret Place
At the core of every human heart is a longing for connection—to be known, loved, and understood.
For wives, this yearning extends to both our relationship with God and our husband. God invites us into a deep and abiding communion with Him, and from this overflow of divine intimacy, we can nurture a thriving marriage.
The psalmist writes,
“He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty”
Psalm 91:1 AMP
In the secret place, we find strength, wisdom, and peace to navigate life’s challenges—including those within our marriages. It is where God’s unconditional love heals our wounds, restores our souls, and equips us to love our husbands as Christ loves us. The secret place is not a physical location but a sacred posture of the heart, where we intentionally seek God above all else.
As Jesus taught:
“But when you pray, go into your most private room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is in secret; and your Father, who sees [what is done] in secret will reward you”.
Matthew 6:6 AMP
This verse reminds us that the secret place is an invitation to intimacy with God, away from the distractions of the world. It is here that He meets us, transforms us, and equips us to build stronger relationships with our husbands.
Cultivating Intimacy with God
Intimacy with God requires intentionality, vulnerability, and surrender. It begins with a willingness to quiet our hearts, silence the world’s distractions, and enter God’s presence with expectancy. As wives, cultivating this intimacy not only strengthens our spiritual walk but also enriches our marriage.
Here are practical steps to help you nurture this connection:
- 1. Set Aside Dedicated Time
Prioritize daily time for prayer, worship, and reflection. When you make time to meet with God, you’ll find it easier to bring His love and grace into your marriage.
- 2. Eliminate Distractions
Create a quiet environment, free from interruptions, where you can focus solely on God. Encourage your husband to join you in setting aside moments of stillness and prayer.
- 3. Engage in Scripture Meditation
Allow God’s Word to wash over you, speaking truth and life into your heart. Consider how the Scriptures can shape both your personal walk and your role as a wife.
- 4. Journal Your Journey
Journaling is a powerful way to deepen intimacy with God. Write out your prayers, reflections, and the insights He reveals during your quiet time. Create a shared journal with your husband to document how God is working in your marriage.
- 5. Practice the Presence of God
Invite Him into every aspect of your day, not just your designated “quiet time.” This includes your interactions with your spouse—seeking God’s guidance in how to love and serve him well.
- 6. Seek Spiritual Mentorship
Connect with others who encourage and challenge you in your journey of faith. As a wife, find mentors who can offer wisdom on building a godly marriage.
Overcoming Obstacles to the Secret Place
The path to intimacy with God—and by extension, your husband—is not without its challenges. Common obstacles include busyness, doubt, and feelings of unworthiness.
Here’s how to navigate these barriers:
- 1. Busyness and Distractions
In a fast-paced world, it’s easy to let the demands of life crowd out time with God. Guard your sacred time and set boundaries to protect it. Invite your husband to prioritize this time with you as a couple.
- 2. Feelings of Unworthiness
Remember, it is God’s grace—not our merit—that invites us into His presence. Meditate on the truth that you are a beloved child of God, and let that truth shape how you approach your marriage.
- 3. Lack of Discipline
Cultivating the secret place requires commitment. Enlist accountability partners or use tools like journals to help maintain consistency. Share your journey with your spouse and encourage one another to remain steadfast.
What distractions or obstacles currently keep you from spending time with God?
How can you address them this week?
The Rewards of Abiding in the Secret Place
When we dwell in the secret place, we unlock a treasure trove of spiritual blessings that ripple into our marriages:
- Clarity of Vision: As we align our hearts with God’s will, we gain divine perspective and direction for our lives and marriages.
“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” — Psalm 119:105 - Supernatural Strength: God’s presence renews our strength, empowering us to face life’s challenges with courage and resilience.
“But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired.” — Isaiah 40:31 - Wisdom and Revelation: In the secret place, the Holy Spirit illuminates the Scriptures, providing wisdom for decisions and insight into God’s plans for our marriages.
“For I always pray to the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, that He may grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation [of insight into mysteries and secrets] in the [deep and intimate] knowledge of Him.” — Ephesians 1:17 - Spiritual Transformation: As we abide in Christ, the Holy Spirit reshapes our hearts and minds, conforming us to His image and fostering lasting change in both our personal lives and our marriages.
“And all of us, as with unveiled face, [because we] continued to behold [in the Word of God] as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are constantly being transfigured into His very own image in ever-increasing splendor and from one degree of glory to another; [for this comes] from the Lord [Who is] the Spirit.” — 2 Corinthians 3:18
Deepening Your Experience in the Secret Place
To make your time in the secret place more meaningful, it helps to approach it with creativity and intentionality.
Here are additional ways to deepen your experience:
- Journaling Your Journey: Keep a journal to record prayers, reflections, and revelations from your time with God. This practice allows you to document your spiritual growth and recognize patterns of His faithfulness in your life and your marriage.
- Incorporating Worship: Use music or singing to create an atmosphere of praise and adoration. Worship shifts our focus from ourselves to the greatness of God and opens our hearts to His presence.
- Praying Scripture: Transform Bible verses into personal prayers. For instance, take Psalm 23 and speak it over your life: “Lord, You are my Shepherd; I lack nothing. Guide me, restore me, and lead me on paths of righteousness.”
- Fasting as an Act of Devotion: Dedicate a season of fasting to focus on God. This practice helps attune your heart to His voice and brings spiritual clarity for your life and your marriage.
- Exploring Nature: Sometimes the secret place can be found in the beauty of creation. Take a walk in a quiet park or sit by a stream, letting the wonder of God’s handiwork draw you into His presence.
Stories of Transformation
Throughout history, countless individuals have testified to the life-changing power of the secret place. Moses encountered God on Mount Sinai and came down with a radiant face, reflecting the glory of the Lord. David, a man after God’s own heart, wrote psalms that reveal his intimate relationship with the Almighty. Even Jesus regularly withdrew to solitary places to commune with the Father, modeling the importance of the secret place for us.
In modern times, believers continue to experience profound transformation through time spent with God. For wives, dedicating intentional time with God can bring healing, peace, and renewal into your marriage. Testimonies abound of people finding healing from deep wounds, receiving direction for major life decisions, and growing in faith as they consistently meet God in the secret place.
For myself, dedicating just 10 minutes a day in the secret place (which was literally all the time I had) helped me to find peace amidst the chaos of being the sole caregiver for my previous husband, who died. I share this only to remind us that even small steps yield profound results when we prioritize God. Without that small amount of time with God in the secret place, I honestly would not have made it through such a hard time in my life. But God so graciously gave me the profound peace I needed to continue on, for it says in Isaiah:
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.”
–Isaiah 26:3
Embracing the Journey
The secret place is not a one-time destination but a lifelong journey of deepening intimacy with God. It is where we pour out our hearts, receive His love, and are equipped for our divine calling. It is where we are equipped to love our husbands as God calls us to. As the apostle Paul reminds us,
“The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
— Philippians 4:7
Commit to carving out time each day to enter the secret place and cultivate a relationship with your Heavenly Father. Invite your husband to join you in seeking God together. As you do, may you experience the profound transformation that comes from abiding in His presence. Let your marriage be a testimony to the power of God’s love, grace, and transformation.
The Eternal Invitation to the Secret Place
The invitation to the secret place is one that God extends to all His children. As it so beautifully says in Philippians 3:10:
10 [For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [[a]which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope]
–Philippians 3:10 AMP
It is a personal, intimate call to know Him more deeply and experience the fullness of His love. The rewards of answering this call are immeasurable. From renewed strength to divine wisdom, the secret place becomes a wellspring of life for the believer.
Call to Action: Your First Step
To begin your journey into the secret place, download our free Journaling Time With Jesus Journal.
The journey to unlocking the secret place starts with a simple step of faith. Will you take it? Set aside intentional time this week to seek God wholeheartedly. Whether through prayer, worship, or simply sitting in stillness before Him, know that He is waiting to meet you. Let this sacred pursuit transform your life and marriage, one moment in His presence at a time.
As you unlock the secret place, may your soul be nourished, your faith strengthened, and your life and marriage forever changed by the boundless love of our Savior.
Journaling Prompt: How can I prioritize time with God daily?
This article was originally published on His Daily Scribe Blog.
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